Right before Giving Tuesday, we all got many emails from various groups with some version of the following message:

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Giving Tuesday 3X Match Offer – Limited time only!!

Triple your impact ahead of Giving Tuesday! An anonymous donor has offered to triple match any gifts made by December 2, up to $200,000.

Make a gift today and it will be tripled. To be matched, your gift must be received by 11:59 p.m. on December 2, 2025.

Don’t miss this opportunity to triple the impact of your support!

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This email has an exciting tone (all those exclamation points!)… However, before I hit the One Time Gift button, as a donor I have a few questions:

1) How do I know that MY gift will be matched?

2) Will the anonymous donor stop triple matching after $200,000 is reached, if that happens before midnight on December 2?

3) Would the anonymous donor have made this gift of $600,000 (?) anyway? Or is this just a device to encourage more giving for Giving Tuesday? Is there an anonymous donor?

4) Do I care?

No matter the answers to questions 1) through 3) above, the most important question may be 4) Do I care?

Because I can EASILY answer question 4! And the answer is, “Not much.” Either a) I already support this group or I plan to support them, and I will make a gift in any case, or b) I might give in the future but I have no intention to give at this time, and this confusing message just annoys me.

In the field of donor relations, we really try not to confuse or annoy anyone, especially those who have already given and might give again - our most valuable donors.

I submit that appeal messages like the above are not only confusing to anyone who really thinks about what the words mean, but may also be discouraging to the philanthropic impulse. This message is really about “tripling your money” and not much about what the group is doing. Have we been so affected by the gambling culture we live in that we apply those concepts to our appeals for charitable support?

It's tempting to do what so many others do by using this gift "matching" concept and language. But using it casts us adrift in a sea of other similar pitches, especially on Giving Tuesday.

Instead, we can tell the story of how we use the funds our donors give us. We can describe how much difference $100 can make, along with the gifts of others. We can tell the story of one of the beneficiaries of our mission, or maybe the story of a donor who was moved by our work.

I realize these suggestions involve drafting custom messages, but they will be distinctive from all the other messages donors are getting right now. You will be reminding donors of how much they value what you do, and how meaningful it is to support your group.

I am purposefully writing this article AFTER Giving Tuesday, in hopes that some groups will be more thoughtful and more authentic about their messaging throughout the year.

I do care about THAT, and I’m confident you do as well.